The Next Chapter;

It’s been over a year since I last sat down to write. Definitely not for lack of content, but I feel like when there’s a lot of change happening it feels too overwhelming to break it down into words.

Here I am a year later and my life is wildly different, and surprisingly the same. I am again about to head away for NOLS. This time however, I am going to be working for NOLS! I can’t begin to express how thankful I am for this opportunity. I have no clue how this is going to go. I am going to be the Kitchen Manager at the Three Peaks Ranch in Wyoming. I’ll be in charge of the cook house and feeding students and instructors coming through The Ranch from May until September or November. I will be living at the Ranch. I spent 11 days there early last spring while I finished my Wilderness First Responder course and it was such a magical place. It was the off season and there was still quite a bit of snow on the ground. During the summer months Three Peaks is a working horse ranch. NOLS has horse packing courses that use the ranch as home base. I am beyond excited to be there during the summer!

My hope is that I can bring warmth and love to everyone through food.

In all honestly, I have no clue how I’m going to fare as a chef. I have never done anything like that. Logistically the job is definitely in my wheel house. I can order and inventory food, keep a schedule, understand projected output based on volume of “business”. But actually cooking for groups of people, mostly on my own…Lord help me. I believe in my self sincerely, although not without caution. I’m sure there will be times that I fail, its going to be a ton of trial and error. I really hope there isn’t too much error, good food can make your day do a complete 180. During my time at Three Peaks food was pivotal. Not only was it the most social part of the day, but food was AMAZING. Also having it made for you was such delight after weeks of cooking on a whisper-lite. The cook house was a warm and welcoming space that everyone can hang out, bullshit and eat great food. I want to do that for everyone at The Ranch, and I’ll work damn hard for it.

As my “go date” rapidly approaches the Washington FOMO is getting too real..

I can’t possibly do everything that I want to do before I go. In fact there’s a good part of me that would feel completely content If I wasn’t leaving. I have met some pretty amazing people in the last few months and I want to spend as much time with them as possible. I have so many plans to climb and adventure that would take all summer to even make a dent in the list…but I have to go. That part of me that isn’t ready hurts when I think about it. I had a similar feeling when I left for NOLS last year. I worried that everyones life would go on without me, and it does. I know that now, which doesn’t make it better but also doesn’t make it too much worse. I’m always afraid of being left behind, forgotten. The truth is that life is like a river. It will always move forward, never seeing the same point twice. It will meet obstacles and move around or through them, and do so whether you like it or not. Im learning to embrace this.

This next phase for me is mine alone.

I set a goal for myself 8 months ago, to do whatever I had to do to get back into NOLS. I did it. I fucking did it. I am so proud of myself, and I am really nervous. For the first time in my life I’m feeling like a late bloomer and it’s a strange feeling. Walking away from everything that you have that is comfortable and familiar into a place where you don’t know anyone, to a job you have never done is scary. People do it all the time, I am no pioneer. But I can’t ignore the fact that for me, this is huge. I have no idea what the next few months will look like, I am SO excited and SO anxious at the same time. I’m going to keep my head up, eyes open and take it all in. Every moment I have in the count down to departure will be cherished. Every experience I gain after my lift off will be the product of hard work, determination and desire to live my life with intention.